How To Quit Watching Porn - Porn Addiction No More
This is Dr.
Sahib Dino from Black Book Review Club and today I want to talk to you about why you should stop watching porn. Now I'm
sure people are watching this and thinking fuck that, you're not taking away my
porn from me, that's all I've got left, and I'm here to tell you that you
should stop it and I'll tell you why. The first reason I want to tell you what
you should stop it is because it's unnatural, okay? Your brain is only used to
seeing things and getting excited when they're real, okay? You're basically,
back in the olden days, think about your ancestors, your ancestors was able to
see maybe 30, 40 girls over his entire lifespan, okay, and when he would see a
girl that meant that there was a chance for reproduction. That's a chance for him
to pass on his genes. So he would see an attractive girl and then he would get
excited and say, you know what, this is what I need to do, and this is where I
need to pass on my genes. Fast forward to present day and you can see those 30,
40 girls that he would see in his entire lifespan, you'd be able to see them in
10, 15 minutes on a screen, okay? Now think about why that's wrong. Your brain
is used to firing dopamine when you're going to get food, when you're going to get
sex, one of these things where you're going to help your chances of survival.
So
if your brain is firing dopamine, back then, it was firing dopamine because
there was a good chance of reproducing and you'd get excited, whereas now,
you're watching 30, 40 girls on a screen when you're like changing them and
changing them, and like within almost 10, 15 minutes, you're able to switch
whenever you want, okay? So your brain is firing dopamine, pssht, DOPAMIIINE!!!
And as soon as you have like a little bit of disinterest, you are able to close
video, open new video, and then you're sending more and more dopamine, because
your brain still sees this as a chance to reproduce. Your brain's thinking all
these girls, I'm going to be able to reproduce with. So that's why you're still
firing dopamine into your body and you’re like, oh God, I've got to do this,
okay? Now the other reason why I think it's bad for you is because it's an unnatural
position, even, okay? When you're sitting down and watching porn, you're either
on a screen from your phone holding it and watching it like that and that's
what you're getting excited, or you're sitting down at your computer and you're
typing on your keyboard and playing with your mouse, and it's just a very unnatural
way for you to get aroused, okay? So your body kind of gets used to this
position and what happens when you see a real girl, when you're out with her
and you go home and you're in a bed? You're like, you've got all these
emotions, you've got all this touching, all these smells, all this, so much
energy is going on and you like, oh my God, I don't know what to do… So, some
people have erectile dysfunction, all right, and you shouldn't be having that
kind of stuff if you're a young guy who's out there trying to get laid.
You're
not supposed to get erectile dysfunction. If anything, you're supposed to get a
little bit nervous, but that's about it. But what's happening is that you're so
used to seeing girls on the screen it's a completely different reality to you
once you get a girl in bed, you're like... Actually I know some people who say,
I prefer watching porn, and masturbating to that, than having sex. Why? Because
they've conditioned themselves so much that this is what they need, that this
is their bread and butter and that's all they need and that real sex is bad for
them, that's what they've conditioned themselves to do. Now the other reason
why it's bad for you is because you are being told by your body that it's satisfied,
you're like, you know what, you're telling your brain, you know what, you
wanted sex, I got it for you, I got it and there's 30 girls, I got sex with 30
girls for you, I've been watching on my screen and I got it for you, and your
brain thinks okay cool, that's good... And then it's conditioned that the only
way you've had it from last time, from previous experience, is 30, 40 girls on
a screen, and it keeps this reference experience and it's just like forever
it's like a buildup of, this is what I'm used to, okay? So your body's being
lied to that it's satisfied. So basically porn is rotting your brain.
Just
in the same way your body needs food, you need nutrition, you need vitamins,
and when you're hungry your body wants this stuff, and sometimes you can trick
it. You can trick it by not actually getting the things you need. You will get
a fast food burger. You go to McDonald's and you get a burger and you eat it,
and there's all these salts and sugars and your body gets tricked into, oh
cool, I got the nutrition value of my day, that's good, I'm happy. No need for
more food, no need for vegetables, I'm good, I'm happy with this meal that I've
had. So think about watching porn as like a mass version of eating fast food.
If you eat fast food for an entire year, it'll be the same thing systematically
as watching porn for an entire year. You're doing the exact same lie to your
brain, you're saying, you know what, you wanted something, here you go. And as
we've gotten so used to in our modern-day society, it's instant gratification.
You're so used to saying, I want this, and then you'll see a big advert of "burger,
two dollars, one huge burger the size of your head, take it, it's going to fill
you up, it's all you need". And you're like, okay cool, and you're lied
to, because you're thinking, my body needs this. Same thing with watching porn,
you are going to be like, I don't need to have sex right now, I don't need to
go out, here's my computer, I'm going to sit down and watch porn. And you're lying
to your brain! It gets you so lazy that people who actually watch porn and up
going out less, from my previous experience of guys who I've seen who, all they
do is just sit at home and watch porn, they just get lazy. So it comes to the
point where they're like, you know what, I'm not even going to go out tonight,
I've already watched porn, I've already masturbated, it's all good.
Now
don't confuse this, I'm not saying stop masturbating. You can carry on your
masturbating using your imagination, but definitely don't carry on masturbating
while watching porn, getting your body conditioned to lying to yourself where
it's just like, okay cool this is what I need. Now let's compare the two: when
you're sitting down until watching porn and you're on your laptop, so you're
used to being, you know, sat on a table, watching a screen, clicking around,
and you're at it with your other hand and you're just like clicking through,
changing searches… When you get bored a little bit, when you're dopamine level
drops a tiny bit, you're used to changing the screen, changing the scene and
then you're like, dopamine back up! And it's firing, firing, firing until you
reach a climax. So you're used to doing it from your laptop or even nowadays
from your phone where you're just looking at your phone and going through
different kinds of videos until your brain gets like the perfect scene for you
to climax.
Now
in real life, you're not sitting down on the table and you're not holding a
screen in your hand. What you programmed yourself to do is wrong, okay? So when
you're out with a girl, and a lot of guys have this problem, guys come to me
and say, I was able to take her home and able to do everything, but I couldn't
get an erection. Why is that, you know, I really am attracted to her but I just
couldn't get an erection. Now one of the things is you're probably nervous,
that's true, you're probably nervous, and that's why, but at the same time,
these guys who are maybe even able to get an erection but they're not able to
climax is because they're so used to conditioning themselves on watching porn,
sitting like this while looking at the phone and being able to change scenes as
many times as they want. So when you're out there in the real world, it's a completely
different ballgame. You're not used to that, you're used to doing it one way.
Now the other extreme is people say, no fap, no fap 90 days, don't even do
that... bullshit. I don't think that's a good thing at all, don't go one
extreme or the other. That's a problem with pickup, people have a skewed vision
of how pickup should be. Just like, go in all out or go out. You can't do that,
you can't be zero or 100%, you have to find the fine line, that's why I think
calibration is really important in pickup, because goes a very used to just
having one way or another. For example when people say in nightlife you
shouldn't go out and buy a girl drinks.
That's
fine, but there are situations where it's like, you know what, I've already
slept with this girl, yes I am going to take of my five dollars, five euros,
whatever and I'm going to buy this go drink, calm down, like it's not that big
of deal. But a lot of guys are so conditioned of, no no no, they told me I
shouldn't buy drinks, I'm not buying the drinks, never, never, not me. So you
kind of have to like, not be socially awkward about it. It's not zero or 100.
You can finally find the fine-tune of it, where it's like, you know what, the situation
calls for it, we've already hooked up, I can buy her a drink, it's not a big
deal. So the same thing when you're watching porn. You don't have to completely
cut out masturbation, I'm not saying that. I say carry on masturbating, just
use your imagination, you don't have to watch porn and condition yourself to
it, but at the same time, if you are going to masturbate, only do it when you
come home at the end of the night at like four, five in the morning, and you've
completely failed, okay? Don't use it as an excuse, don't do it before you go
out of the house, because that's another thing, people go spend their whole
week working, and when the weekend comes, they're like, you know what, I'm
going to go out, it's going to be great, I'm going to party, they switch on the
porn, the masturbate, they climax, and then it's just like, you know what, I
don't really need to go out.
The
challenge I want to set for you guys in this video is, go out for an entire
week, set aside an entire week where you're going to go out for four nights out
of that seven- day period. For that entire week you're not allowed to watch
porn, and for those four nights you're going to go out until the bitter end,
okay? You're going to go out from the time the club opens until four, five, six
in the morning, depending on the time the club closes in your area. And you're
going to go out and you're going to push yourself until the bitter end, until
you have not taken home anyone, and only once you have failed, if you've gone
out and you failed and you weren't able to take someone home, then you can go
home and masturbate. Still, don't watch porn, go home and masturbate and say,
you know what, I tried, I'm going to give myself a little break.
If
you really can't, for those of you who are like, I'm really dedicated to
quitting this, completely stop masturbating for the entire week, okay? I'm not
saying do it for life, but for those seven days don't masturbate. Go out there
and you'll see how your basic male instinct is so much stronger. You're not
going to go to the club and go up to girls like, oh hey, you're going to have
more like instinct, like ooh, yeah, this is who I am, this is who I represent,
I'm a fucking man, whereas if you watch porn you're kind of like, more like,
hey...? I don't really need this because I've already watched porn, but hi, how
are you? Maybe I'll be able to take you home. Maybe I'll get an erection. A lot
of the guys will have that problem because they're so used to watching porn
that they won't be able to get an erection or even climax because they're so
used to watching it sitting at home on a laptop watching the screen and that's
what they're programmed their mind into thinking that that's what sex should
feel like. All right? That's all from me, and until next time, take care guys!
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